Don’t you take chances, you might feel the pain

1. It’s 4 days to the start of As.

2. I’m not ready I’m not ready I’m not ready I’m freaking not ready.

3. I haven’t stepped out of my house since monday.

4. Wake up study watch tv eat watch tv study watch tv eat study watch tv watch tv watch tv sleep. Repeat.

5. Wtf is wrong with me why am I watching so much tv, and crying over almost every serial why is every show so heartbreaking.

6. I can’t do stats at all, yay me.

7. Why couldn’t you just care for a little while now, it won’t kill your grades

8. I realised why I’m not motivated

9. I won’t cry

10. It’s 24 days to the end.

Keep going?

Someone tell me, I’ve been studying everyday, why is it that I feel like as though I’m back at square one with nothing going into my head? Someone tell me why is it that I lack the focus every single time I sit at the table? Someone tell me why the hell am I even bothering.

Somehow, I think that I’m going to screw the big A, cause I’m feeling more and more unprepared. Ironic huh, ain’t people suppose to feel more prepared each time they hit the books? I can’t believe it, it’s only 18 more days, and I feel like I need another year to study. Actually? I don’t want to study at all. I’m so unproductive every single day it’s as though I’m not doing any work at all. I’m better off sleeping my life away than getting these hideous eyebags.

I just need the motivation again. Fucking bad.

Fly away with me

Life sucks. I can’t do complex numbers. Head hurts. Lost focus. I want to watch tv, I have this urge to watch romantic dramas. I feel like sitting on a plane. And flying away. UGH LIFE SUCKS.

Today is a bad day.

Protected: Because I’m scared to try

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Looking in your eyes

Prelims are over, omfg thank heavens. It was so liberating to walk out of the hall knowing I wont step in again..until As that is. BUT. For now, I’m so happy prelims are over, and even though I screwed up, it’s over it’s over yay. Studied at the airport with the class girls (most) for physics mcq (omg can you imagine, 2 freaking hours) It was pretty productive but really really taxing. By the time we headed back to school my brain was pretty much fried. So whatever whatever, after phy paper ended, some people actually screamed? HAHA. Anywayyy, went to the Cathay with the class, and tried to get Gamer tickets, but the lady at the counter wanted all of our Ez links, and so we couldn’t fake cause some were still 17, gahhhh. Ended up watching Fame, which wasn’t good (to me) the dancing and singing was fabulous though.

I went to town today! Like finally omfg, missed the short train rides seriously. Went to Ion with wj, and I freaking love the place, it has every single shop. I want to go again, I didn’t even buy much, I need my mummy he was so tired after a while ): I think guys just can’t shop :p Anyway, had a nice dinner at the jap restaurant at the Cathay (there, again) and then we went home. Gna see him again tmr, heehee.

I hope wed never comes I dont want this to endddddd ):

You make me feel

1. My days will be math chem phy math chem phy math chem phy repeat (x 10^23) until friday comes ( I hope :/ )

2. I totally screwed all my papers so far, and I’m screwing the rest by not studying now, damn it I hate the mac.

3. Coffee’s my favourite drink now

4. My apettite is huge recently, it’s scary :O Must be making up for the loss of poor brain cells

5. I miss spending time doing something else but staying home and staring at white sheets and zoning out, I want to go out with you ):

6. I suddenly miss the old times, when I still mattered to you

7. Sometimes I hate myself for not doing as much as I wish I could at a time like this

8. I’m tired.

9. I have regrets, frustrations, unwanted emotions, anger, weight issues, heartaches, have you?

10. I wake up each day wishing it was sunday

Straight through my heart

Hate prelims much? Omfg.

I wish it was end of prelims alr I have megaaaaaa plans heehee (ok not really) I want to watch a lot of movies and I want to watch VMA tmr ugh ugh ugh stupid mtv why cant they show it another day ):

Oh, the other night, I dreamt that my gc was my handphone and I carried it around to text. Ha ha ha, super duper lame.

I want this dec to come, realllllyyyyyyyyy sooon.

I must love studying, studying is my favourite pasttime, notes are my best friends, I live for exams, I love studying I love studying I love studying.

-

I wish that you had more time for me

Tell me, again

1. I haven’t ponned a single day this week, I deserve a pat on the back.

2. I’ve been playing Who has the biggest brain? everyday and I’ve upgraded from a scholar to a genius to a cyborg to an alien to squidlian to a BITBOT! I’m a machine, hello how cool is that.

3. There’s a new wanton mee stall in school and I’ve yet to try it, I heard it’s really really good!

4. People piss me off too easily these days.

5. I did two surveys this week, and both times they asked if I liked going to school, I said no. I really don’t. I haven’t hated school since a long time ago.

6. They were giving out free cheese today, in school. Tell me, the point is..?

7. I miss you even though I see you everyday

8. Retainers are actually far more uncomfortable than braces, oh hell.

9. It rained so freaking heavily today, I could have jumped into puddles if I didnt have my backpack with me

10. I have a pretty bright red clock on my table, it’s typical kind of clock with the alarm thingy on top. I’m loving those kind of clocks (:

11. I’ve been hooked on to E! entertainment, MTV, and hk drama channels OMFG, great timingggggg.

12. Prelims are in…THEY ARE COMING SOON.

13. I feel very very fat and it doesn’t help it that I’m eating so much junk. Need to run and lose weight. not happening.

14. I need a starbucks at home, so I get a constant intake of caffaine to keep awake.

15. I really hate school. And people, sometimes.

16. Oh, BDD was such a blast. It was so so cool and fun and sad and funny and much camwhoring. Photos flood fb, heehee times I love fb. But my album screwed up. UGH.

17. I got 100% attendance for band this year again! HAHA so amazing, and I thought I ponned :pI got a cup that said: I AM A J2 WITH NO LIFE AND A PASSION FOR BAND for invest, hee so cute.

18. Been eating too much shaker fries since macs decided to have it again! Not a good thing.

19. I have a urge to make strawberry ice cream and eat it with chocolate sauce and mnms.

20. I’ve been an evil evil girl who bitched far too much for her own good. I will cut down, I swear.

21. Tuition work is killing me. And trees.

22. My mummy threatened me with a huge bug today and said, ‘quick say I love you mummy! If not I throw this bug at you.’ My mummy is sooooo childish.

23. I’m going to change my specs soon cause horrible eyesight is going

24. I want to mug non-stop, like how people claim not to do. But I really want to.

25. I still want to watch Up and so many other movies ):

26. I live for sundays

27. I miss all my friends (hello clique we need to meet up)

28. If time would stop right now, I’d be too happy. (with you)

29. I miss that blue pinafore and white blouse, and morning runs and hymns and prayers

30. I wish I didn’t just typed all that down cause I wasted 20minutes of my precious time I could have napped

Because I can’t sleep till you’re next to me

Yesterday was college day & Homecoming dinner. Was excused for College day (I didn’t pon like the other girls, haha!) and met wj for lunch at Ajisen. Off to school for rehearsal, which was so stupid cause we stood in the sun for sooooo long only to play like what, 2 notes? And then the rehearsal was over (!!) So it was a break from 1445h to 1715h so 6 of us decided to cab over to parkway to waste our time away. So cool ok the taxi uncle totally didn’t even blink when 6 of us hopped into the cab, it was as though it was normal..so it was a 60cents trip to parkway, beats taking bus heeheehee. Sat at macs and talked and talked, and stared at Gillian do her card. Went back to school late, and missed the rehearsal, HA. Dinner was camwhoring, cause there weren’t any of the bakerzin lovely cupcakes thingy when I went to the table ): OH. Jumbo totally transformed our canteen to their mega kitchen, it was so so cool I want to work at Jumbo. Plus the canteen smelt so delicious for once!! Omg, it was satisfying just breathing in the smell of chili crab heh. Ay, but! The school didnt offer us any ): So played while mr president strolled on the red carpet, then were asked to leave alr. OMG laaaa. I have a craving for chili crab and man tou (cute little bun, hee)

Because I have many things to say but am too lazy..

1. I had the sweetest strawberry milkshake ytd it was undrinkable

2. I went to my mum’s salon and my mum said to trust the guy cause he’s damn good..and I came home with curls :/

3. Someone gave us THREE loaves of milk bread and now I have to eat them.

4. Oh, liverpool came to vj on fri and I couldn’t be bothered to stay back HAHA.

5. Braces are off soooooooon!

6. I’m broke.

7. THERE’S NO SCHOOL TMR YAY YAY YAY YAY YAY YAY

8. My mum and Anabel are watching Prison Break (season 4) without me ughhhhh

9. I hate it that I go to Sean’s ex-blog and I see the ‘1 month 18 days .. until Prelims’ countdown thingy OMG I need to get down to studying.

10. My middle name will be Nerd from today. Full-time ok.

Drift away

Somehow, I think that you dont know that I know. And somehow, I know that you think that I think it’s alright. But somehow, I know that we know that this isn’t going to work at all. Why are we still playing pretend?

-

Why is it always never enough for you? You don’t know how much effort I’ve put in. It’s always this way. Don’t come telling me that I push myself too hard. You made me this way. To think I was feeling guilty and not wanting to disappoint you. He was right, I should do it for myself. Not for you.

-

It’s scary how people are ___ and ____ such good ___ why the hell am I still ____ now I get it, it’s time to stop ___ and start ___ and not ___ what they ___. Everyone lies.

-

I thank god for you. And I love you.